After dating divorce dont
Cathy Meyer is a certified divorce coach, marriage educator, freelance writer, and founding editor of Divorced
As a divorce mediator, she provides clients with strategies and resources that enable them to power through a time of adversity. In the survey participants were asked to rate their happiness before and after their divorce.
That argument only holds water if you delve into the many reasons women file for divorce.
There are many reasons women file for a divorce and not all of those reasons have anything to do with falling out of love or no longer being happy in the marriage. She has been abandoned and left with no recourse but to file for a divorce and pursue child support via the family court system.
She can give into the trauma of the divorce or rebuild her life and get on with the business of living. Men keep it close to the vest when dealing with emotional upheaval. While men look outward when seeking comfort from emotional pain, women look inward. They will put an effort into staying physically healthy during the trauma of divorce. They do however use different coping skills than men when dealing with emotional trauma and, based on the study, those skills make it possible for women to move on and be happier than men after divorce. Women are more likely to take on, happily the challenges of single motherhood and relish in that role. Women are more likely to be comfortable in their own skin.
Not reaching out for support prolongs their suffering and the time it takes to heal. They take an internal inventory of the role they played in the demise of the marriage, they work at getting their emotional “ducks in a row” and letting go of the past so they can focus on the future. They will have more focus on eating properly and working out in an effort to stave off illness and depression. They are more comfortable with the idea of going it alone, choosing a course of action they believe in and moving forward.
Let me tell you my experience and if it sounds familiar, rest assured you’re not alone. After my divorce, I was very quick to try and date. I felt unlovable and unwanted and I just wondered if anyone could and would ever want me again. So, I went out on a couple of dates and I quickly realized, I wasn’t ready.
For instance, when you are in a serious relationship people will ask; “When do you think you’ll get engaged?They don’t go out immediately looking for a replacement unit for the husband they just divorced.Most people I know have a love hate relationship when it comes to dating after marriage.Dating after divorce is also the best thing on earth if you fall for someone and you get really cute texts and you feel like you’re in high school again. But when you meet the right one, it will all have been worth it. The Trasher: The trasher is the person who cannot stop trashing his or her ex. He’s had a million girlfriends, but always ends the relationship.Dating is awful when you really thought you hit it off with a guy and you never hear from him again. I could tell story after story about the weirdos, psychos, bizarre, needy, mean spirited, bitter men I’ve met in the past, but I could also tell you about the many wonderful, caring, giving, loving men who are great catches. It’s putting yourself out there in hopes to meet someone you really connect with. In the meantime, here are 5 people you really don’t want to date. He is constantly calling her “the bitch.” Or she is telling you about every little thing he does that bothers her (in detailed stories that take a half hour.) The trasher is clearly is not over the anger and bitterness of the separation, and needs either time or therapy or both. The sticker: This person is the opposite of the trasher. I want to clarify that I think it is wonderful when ex’s can get along and have birthday dinners with their kids as a family, but you will know if it’s gone beyond that, so don’t fool yourself. The drinker: People who are going through a divorce are very prone to alcohol addiction for two reasons.
Dating is fun and exciting and sexy if you’re on a date with someone you really like.